MORNINGS

​Hey, hey, hey, it’s only the bloody weekend! After spending the last two weekends ‘treading the boards’ in village panto, I can finally get down to what weekends are really all about…housework.  Now, I’m not one to moan about being a single mum, I don’t like to make a big thing of it, we muddle along quite well, just the two of us, but sometimes, it would be so good to not be a grown-up.  To be able to get excited about Friday nights like I used to.  Getting ready to go out at 9pm, instead of getting ready to go to bed at 7pm.  As I write this, it’s 7:35pm on Friday night, and I’m sitting in my pyjamas and fuzzy slippers, counting down the minutes before it’s acceptable for me to go to bed.  Then, tomorrow, I get the joy of scraping up 4 weeks’ worth of scum, washing and other general grossness that comes from not doing housework for a month.  The best bit about the weekend though?  Aside from the smell of the tumble dryer (literally the best smell in the world), the best thing about the weekend, is that I don’t have to be anywhere at any particular time.  Not having to get Oscar up, washed, dressed, and looking well-looked-after by 8am doesn’t half make a difference to the mood of the day!  When the first hour of your day doesn’t involve shouting “GET YOUR SHOES ON” 30 times, you can achieve pretty much anything, even cleaning, and what’s more, you can achieve it with a smile on your face.

School mornings are such hard work.  I’m not sure what it is about the morning that turns a usually capable 5-year-old into a useless lump of “I can’t,” or, “you do it,” or, “I don’t know where they are”.  Toothbrushing transforms into something that could be used as a physical challenge on The Krypton Factor, and the shoes are never where they should be, or even where they could be.  In the night, children’s shoes turn into drunk students, partying the night away and then passing out in places like the toilet, or the garden.  Once, I actually found a shoe in the car.  Oscar had worn it into the house, and the next day, it was in the car.  Some things are just beyond explanation.

Fortunately, it’s half-term next week, so the school uniform pressure is off.  Unfortunately, as a working parent, I have to send Oscar to childcare.  Oscar has to be at this childcare a whole hour earlier than school!  So, while everyone else is enjoying lie-ins and pj days with their kidlets, I will be screaming “GET YOUR SHOES ON!” at 7am instead of 8am.   Sorry neighbours.

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